process of getting smart: make mistakes - learn from 'em

Wow, it has been long time. Hehe. Hello (anyone there?!! Nah kidding :P)

I feel like it’s been forever since my last entry. I even put an “edit later” at the end of the last one (LOL) and never came back to edit it. Hahahaha funny me.

During the time I have been MIA, there have been many things happening in my life. Some remarkable issues are:

My dear little brother officially failed getting into CVA HS since the standard score was not lowered and we (I mean our parents) couldn’t do anything about it. So we actually went through pretty hard time finding a place, oh well I mean school, for him to enroll as the new school year is approaching.

After careful consideration (boy this sounds serious) and countless talks, we decided to send him to Newton Grammar School; and he is oriented to aim for a financial aid package to study abroad (hopefully America).

Well, it’s a ‘phew’ moment for us all (my parents and me) today, since we could finally finalize our last resort. And it seems we (all of us, including my brother) are pretty happy about our choice and eager to get started.

This problem solved really took a big stone down from our chests. Hello some inner peace! Hehe…

Freaking soooooooo many stuffs going on at work. Hahaha. That really got me thinking back to the beautiful lady fortune teller words: “ Workplace is filled with complication”. Turned out, she was right at least at this point. Well well well… I just wanna be able to work in a calm and liberal working environment, so I can focus on my stuffs. But life never follows ur hope, it is a pool of challenges.

I got a talk with my cousin sisters last weekend and realized that we have all grown up a lot since that last time we got that kind of talk. Now we mind our future in a more realistic way, with more worries and less dreams. I am also very glad Hang finally passed her university entrance exam.

She was so stressed out about it whole year round and got so thin. At some point after got the first score result for group A, I could understand how terrified and desperate she was, as I know exactly how it feels to fall down from the earth to hell. Now she can finally rest her heart and mind, since she made it. After all, life is not so unfair. At least all her efforts paid off somehow, not the way everyone thought it would be, but anyway she was successful in what she aimed. I can’t be any happier for her.

Congrats my sis!!!

Besides, the one thing that actually concerns me most is that my study is still on the hanger. FML. I keep having this and that and need to go here and there. That actually comes down to the main point that I practically keep making excuse for myself not to study! Reason? Well: 1 – laziness, 2 – nervousness, 3 – cowardess. Oh dear. I have only a little more than a month and a half left for the preparation. I am really really stressed out about it every single second my head is unoccupied by something else. I really do. But I know I’m not making enough efforts here…

I should start asap before it’s too late, or before I cannot blame anyone else but myself for being stupid and regret it when nothing else can be done. The other day when I was in the shower, my mind suddenly got so clear and all. I raised my will up and thought to myself: no matter how the situation turns out, I would definitely try my best to figure a way to make my burning desire come to reality. Seriously I thought that to myself! And I really did manage to find the strength to face the GRE result even if it’s too bad. I promised myself I would still try my best and not just give up in the middle of the way when things are not finalized yet like the many last times I did…

Some improvements with my self-relationship in the spiritual aspect, however, in the physical side, I am not doing so well with myself. Huhuh, I decided to start the Benzoyl Peroxide Regimen (acne.org) after a long time (a year later after that striking allergy horrible red swollen face last July, wow around this time last year, time freaking flies…).

Ok, so I chose Duac gel with Clindamycin phosphate 1% and Benzoyl peroxide 5% for the treatment, as I could not find anything with 2.5% BP concentration. It’s too bad. I know it would irritate my skin, but I decided to go for it, well at least give it another try. I didn’t know until the next day after I first applied Duac to my skin that previous nite, my skin started dehydrating so badly and turned red and felt like horribly blistering. Oh boy that felt no nice! But the whole story of my experiment with BP regimen will be detailed in a different post.

Only then I realized, oh so that was not an allergy last year, it was just my personal allergic reaction (part of BP side effects). So there I went: making one of the biggest mistakes that are already stated in the website. LOL – stupid me hah! I really hope things turn out differently this time, I mean good result, with clear skin and no more acne! Really there’s not much choices for me now rather than just sticking with the regimen until I can see at least a little result. Well, starting with too much hope and quitting too soon before results could be seen is my always-come-back-to-mistake.

I should really learn to be more patient, shouldn’t I?!!! I KNOW!!!!!!